Marriage readiness checklist

Twenty-four conversations worth having before you marry. Tick each one when you have really talked it through, together.

This is not a test. An unticked box simply shows what to talk about next. Your ticks stay on this page and are not saved or sent anywhere.

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Hopes and intentions

• We have each said what we hope our marriage will be.
• We agree on roughly when we want to marry.
• We know what faithfulness means to each of us, in practice.

Our families

• Our families have met, or we have a plan for them to meet.
• We agree how often we will see our families.
• We know how we will handle it if a family member disagrees with a choice we make together.

Children

• We have talked about whether and when we want children.
• We have talked about what we would do if we could not have children.
• We agree on the role our parents will play with our children.

Money

• We have shared our savings and debts honestly.
• We agree on joint accounts, separate accounts or both.
• We know whether either of us supports family members with money.

Faith and values

• We have talked about the place of faith in our daily life.
• We agree how our children would be raised in terms of faith.
• We know which traditions matter most to each of us.

Home and daily life

• We have agreed how to share the housework.
• We know how much time alone each of us needs.
• We have talked about where we will live.

When we disagree

• We know how each of us likes to handle a disagreement.
• We have had a disagreement, made up and learned something from it.
• We would ask for help, such as a counsellor, if we got stuck.

The future

• We have talked about both of our careers.
• We know whether either of us might want to move country.
• We have said what promise we want to make each other.

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